Freedom in Speech

Written by Courtesy: Daily Nation Friday, 24 June 2011 08:47

Many theories exist about how human beings came into existence, with Christians saying that man was created by God and given the power to multiply, while scientists persuade us that man evolved from apes.

Whichever the case, mankind has changed from existence up to now. In most societies, the only known marriage is between man and woman. But there has been an increase in the number of men and women claiming to be lesbians or gays.

Although such claims are illegal in most constitutions, the practice thrives secretly, despite the spirited resistance from the Church and pro-life activists.

 Practice thrives

Closer home, the practice thrives in Eldoret Town’s Huruma estate in Uasin Gishu County. Mercy Wafula and Amondi Lavenda are living together under one roof as husband and wife. They kept journalists waiting for a while for their story before they appeared in the living room, holding hands and giggling.

Mercy who is the head of the household, poured out her heart. She, “he”, perhaps, said they met while in high school when she was in Form Three while her partner was in Form One.

Mercy said it took her quite some time to express her feelings to Lavenda, as she did not know how she would react.

“I could watch her daily leave for classes, since we shared the dormitory. Her beauty, body size and elegant walking style summarised her whole being."

“I decided to start by being her friend — call it courtship; we could go for meals together.I would buy her “escort” (bread, ndazi, samosa, etc) during breakfast and even help her wash her clothes so that I could win her,” she said.

She added that they became closer, which "was to my  advantage". One day, as they were preparing to go for evening studies (preps), rains started and they stayed back in the dormitory. As they were lying in their beds, she kissed Lavenda who looked shocked but didn’t resist the kiss.“This came as a surprise to me as I had expected a slap on my face. Lavenda cut in to say that she could not explain what happened. “Honestly, I was not expecting something like that to happen as I had never experienced it before ...being kissed by a fellow girl had been the last of my expectations. i found myself to weak to defend myself" She said.

After that kissing incident, Mercy said, they took their relationship to another level. They could write each other letters, and frequently met in the dormitory when the others were in class. They would share the same bed despite the fact that it was against the school rules.

Despite being reported to the administration three times, they continued with the relationship as the prefect had no evidence to warrant any punishment.

As to how they satisfied each other’s desires, they said they only touched and kissed. Lavenda says she completely lost interest in men.

It wasn’t long before Mercy left school ahead of her partner. But they vowed to continue being together and that nothing would separate them.

Mercy and Lavenda have been together for seven years and are comfortable with their future under the same status.

Mercy works with an NGO in Eldoret, providing for “his” wife and their two adopted children — Sam and James aged seven and five years. The “family” did not want their picture taken.

“Mother” and “father” said they opted to adopt children so that their relationship could be more lively and complete.

They admit that life has not been easy as they were disowned by their families, shunned by friends and could not even go for Christian fellowship anywhere for fear of being mocked, but they say they don’t have to please other people.

Mercy says she was introduced to the practice by her aunt, who was taking care of her after her parents divorced. “My mum took me to go and stay with her younger sister.Though she was not married, she struggled to put food on the table for myself and some of our cousins. She then started coming to my room at night. I did not know who to talk to, so I decided to keep quiet and learn to leave with things the way they were.

And Lavenda, the fourth-born in a family of five children says that she comes from a Christian family and she is the only one leading that kind of lifestyle.

They are hoping that the government will soon put forth a law that accommodates their lifestyle.

“We don’t see anything wrong with what were are doing and the society should give us and others with similar lifestyles a chance to live happily like other people,” they said.

They say there are many others leading their lifestyle, but they have remained in secret due to hostility from the society.