Written by Nixon Friday, 10 June 2011 10:18
EVEN IN THE GAY WORLD THERE IS SPOUSAL ABUSE.
Hardly a week passes without news of spousal abuse among heterosexual couples. Although it rarely comes out in public domain, the same may be true in gay relationships.
Abuse may driven by mental disorder such as drove one Mukobero in Kakamega to chop off his wife’s head, kill his four children then walk to a police station to report the incident. But spousal abuse may also driven by jealousy.
In the gay community it is no different after all we are people too. A gay relationship only works well if there is understanding among the partners, trust, and love just like it would in an ordinary relationship.
One Friday evening when eating out in a famous club in Nairobi, a friend of mine got involved in a nasty fight with his partner. They had always had issues since their relationship started getting intimate. On this day, it was out of a desire to dance.
Written by Acer Friday, 10 June 2011 10:01
Maya and Jackie is a lesbian couple that has lived together for six years. They now want to adopt a child to make their house a little warmer. To the non-gay in society, it is hard to comprehend how gay couples can be good parents, or parents at all. The Kenyan society only recognises heterosexuality as the ‘acceptable’ family. It therefore becomes strange that two women would willingly share maternal love for the same child, yet, not by choice but by circumstance.
A gay couple strolls along the streets of Nairobi. Gay and lesbian couples are
increasingly opting to adopt children in order to start a family life.
Their first option was to adopt a child, but this was difficult and eventually in vain. So the couple looked for a sperm donor after which Maya carried the pregnancy. Unfortunately, all the excitement was short lived after Maya miscarried towards the end of the first trimester.
A year later, the couple attempted another pregnancy and this time, Maya carried it to full term and Whitney was born.
Maya and Jackie are among hundreds of gay couples who go to great lengths in an effort to have families.
John and Leo have a different story. They have lived together for seven years and have two daughters. Michelle is 13 years old and Dotty is two. The girls are biological results of John and Leo's separate heterosexual affairs.
Of concern to John is that soon, he will of necessity reveal his gay status to Michelle who will soon become an adult. "Sometimes I worry that she may also end up being a lesbian. But whatever her orientation, I will stand by my daughter" says John.
On her part, Michelle is close to her father's partner. She talks openly to Leo about personally intimate issues that she is not comfortable talking with her biological father, John. But she confesses to feeling excluded when her peers talk about their mothers.
John has been openly gay for nine years while Leo has been open for five years now. John was born and brought up in a small village in rural Kenya where as a teenager he flirted with girls much as he felt his affection was to boys. He joined Leo in Mombasa five years ago where they have lived since. In Mombasa, they maintain two houses. They live in one, and reserve the other for non-gay visitors or relatives who may come calling.
Written by Jim Muthuri Friday, 10 June 2011 09:51
In many places where belonging to the Gay community is considered a vice and inhuman behavior, one of the major worries amongst such individuals is facing stigma and being discriminated against generally.
The perception among the majority of the heterosexual person is that being gay is a choice made by an individual or it is a lifestyle copied from western world. This notion most likely leads to condemnation, hatred and in acceptance of gays in the society since they are largely considered to be abnormal.
Written by Madge Friday, 10 June 2011 09:35
Nana had known she loved differently since she was 12 years old. All along she considered it okay. As she grew older she realized she was not like other girls because she was growing affectionate to both boys and girls. She kept it a secret but knew she would eventually stop living the lie. One Saturday afternoon when on an outing with her girlfriends, she let her secret out. Surprisingly, it turned out that one of the girls was also bisexual and their friendship became stronger.
Written by David Kuria Friday, 10 June 2011 09:21
Wakesa and Osoro have lived together for eight years. When they moved to the neighbourhood where they live, residents assumed they were brothers because of the similarities of their physical features. They in fact are a gay couple. Across the road, Max and Liz will celebrate the sixth anniversary as a lesbian couple in August. These two couples are by no means the only gay and lesbian couples in Kenya.
Yet, in Kenya, same-sex marriage is a criminal offence. The paradox is that criminalisation of same-sex relationships has not stopped gay and lesbian couples from expressing their love for one another and living together far longer than many heterosexual couples. David Kuria spoke to Wakesa about challenges of a gay couple.
Tell me something about yourself Wakesa?
I am 35 yrs old and I knew I was gay since I was very young but only had my first sexual experience when I was 19. This was with a girl, because I wanted to fit in, and it resulted into a pregnancy and from that we were blessed with twins, a son and a daughter.
That however did not stop me from struggling with my sexuality and in 2003 I met Osoro, and we have been together since then.
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